...at which Herman DeVry is currently rotating in his grave.
Number of rotations per minute is an acceptable format for your response but be sure to account for the Earth's underground gravitational pull (assume depth of six feet unless you can prove through research that this figure should be revised; however NO attempt to disturb the burial site should be undertaken, since this will likely change the actual rate of rotation and probably get you arrested); the projected rate of decay of biological mass remaining, inertia, and friction based on the size and coherence of the biological mass compared to the size of the casket or container used. Provide at least five references in APA format, and show all of the work in your calculations.
As a bonus, should you believe in the afterlife, you may attempt to also calculate the number of times the spirit of Lee deForest sighs in shame for any association with his old friend and/or attempts to inflict spiritual retribution upon him. Note: anyone confusing Lee deForest with DeForest Kelley will receive a zero on this question.